Drunk Girls aka Me & My Best Friends

I can’t focus on work at all right now. So I’m just giving up. It’s 3:30.

I’ve decided to leave at 4 anyways (without telling my boss) b/c I’m going skiing this weekend and I wanna get there NOW! There’s like 25 of us going and we’re all staying in a huge cabin and most people took the day off work but I couldn’t b/c we had a lunch meeting and I’m really really outta sick days or any kind of personal leave. Omg, please look at what a long sentence that was. Sounds like I’m 5 years old, that’s amazing.

Anyblue, Juicy’s waiting for me to get off work and we’re driving together. I’m really excited to just lounge around in a cabin castle in sweats and drink all weekend. Oh and ski. Drink and Ski and Lounge and Drink some more.

I’m in a room with Juicy… and a really really really hot British boy. We just met him last night. He literally is here for .5’s boyfriends birthday (they’re good friends) and to ski, and is then going back to London or wherever.

British boy is so sexy. Tall, dark, handsome, broad shoulders, amazing accent, omg. So I’m freaking out b/c last night was .5’s boyfriends birthday celebration and I didn’t feel like going out b/c of Wednesday night.

Omg. I didn’t tell y’all about Wednesday night. HaH! Here, it’s kind of amazing…

Went with a girlfriend (let’s call her Honey) to a bar in Arlington to celebrate her getting a new job (finally) and to maybe meet with Russian boy. She has one beer. I compensate for her lack of drinking by consuming 5 or 6 double vodka soda’s. I forgot I was ordering doubles. Typical.

Russian comes around drink 3 or 4. Buys me a tequila shot. Perf. Just what I need. I look at phone, it’s barely 9:30. I am obliterated beyond belief, I rarely get this drunk. I never get this drunk at a restaurant pub at happy hour. But here I am, Drunk as shit. (I guess I’m back to saying shit again… shit).

Honey has to drive me home and assures me I didn’t make an ass of myself. We get to her house and I beeline to her room to pass out on her bed (even though I never asked if that was ok). I’ve been laying down for 20 seconds when I realize that it feels like everything is still moving… really fast. We all know what that means.

I can honestly say that I’ve always made it to the toilet to puke (not always the bathroom… but if you’re outside I think bushes are fair game). Throwing up is a Godsend. It’s like life cant get any worse and then you throw up and everythings all better again. Really does anything else in life just make everything all better again? B/c mom’s kisses don’t work (she was lying).

I then text Shizzam and tell him I love him and I will marry him in 5 years if I’m not married by then and that I’m going to make him an Aston Martin balloon animal. I have no idea where that came from. But I know I said it, I’ve got BBM (blackberry messenger) proof. WTF is wrong with me. Pass out on couch. All this happens before 11 o’clock pm.

That was Wednesday night.

So I’d say that was a rough night. Now we’re supposed to go out Thursday and drink more for .5’s bf’s birthday. Well, I’m a trooper. So although I hadn’t showered (I know, sick) I put on a cute dress, tights and heels (tights mainly b/c I hadn’t shaved) and Juicy comes over to drive together. We discuss our game plan. We both decide that we have a big weekend ahead of us and we have to work Friday and should only have like one drink.

Yeah fucking right. We say that shit all the time, “oh we’ll only have one” “yeah I’m really tired I really need to go to bed early tonight” but I cant remember a single time it happened.

On the way to the bar I told her I invited the Russian (he texted me about it, he says I invited him, I don’t remember doing this but tell him to come anyways). She’s really excited to meet him. She tells me she invited this kid we met at a bar two weeks ago, we’ll call him Waldo. He was wearing a red hat when we met him. He paid for our drinks that night. He was kinda funny. So Russian and Waldo are supposedly coming.

Then we realize that this is the night we get to meet hot British boy. We’ve all been g-chatting and facebook and gay stuff like that about the ski trip. So we know he’s hot and hilarious. Fuckin A. I should have showered.

This was the funniest night I’ve had in a long long time but ughhh I don’t have time to describe it b/c I’ve gotta go. I’ll write on the ski trip probably (drunk definitely) but I’ve gotta go home and pack and leave. I’m SORRY!

I will tell you that Juicy got so drunk she put her sunglasses on, frowned and didnt speak for 2 hours. During this time she also swayed aimlessly to music, drank more, and tried her damn hardest to get British boy wrapped around her finger. Bless her heart. I looked over at one point and she was making out with him, or trying to. I looked away, it was too painful to watch. She fucked herself over and she can’t even remember doing it.

He’s such a good sport he basically took care of her most of the night but .5 later told me he thinks shes kind of a nut case. So, that’s a score for me since we’re all in the same room together this weekend and I didn’t get that drunk last night. I did get drunk, but it was a very manageable and normal drunk.

Russian came. We made out. He thinks I’m irresistible (he seriously said that). Friends like him a lot.

Waldo may be the next American Psycho. We will never be hanging out with him again.

Juicy spent $90 somehow. I spent $8. The 8 dollars I spent was on chicken fingers to try to sober Juicy up. She ate the piece of lettuce they came on. The boys ate the chicken fingers.

Ok I’m out guys! Have an awesome weekend everyone! I cant wait to find out what happens this weekend. It better be good.

The Girl Next Door Meets Her Match

Elisha Cuthbert had boys and men salivating in The Girl Next Door. Hell, even women had to act quick to close their gaping mouths. Remember?

I'm all wet can I come in?

This is not a post about Elisha Cuthbert. Sorry if you’re a fan. This more important.

Has anyone noticed recently that guys seem fixated on girls with an ethnic edge? B/c I’ve noticed it. And frankly it’s starting to really piss me off.

Even when a guy is totally into me he’s gotta throw a “Oh I’d totally fuck Rihanna that girl is so fuckin hot” out there. Thanks dude. It’s completely impossible for me to ever even aspire to look like Rihanna. So thanks for reminding me that I’m the whitest white girl ever and that evidently being a member of the Aryan race isn’t cool anymore.

Your boyfriend thinks I'm hotter than you

Since when the fuck is being a pretty white girl who also happens to be awesome not good enough? This all came to a head today when I was chatting with Shizzam on g-chat. He sent me a link to pictures from him and friends at some club/bar to show me the girl he now wants to marry (she’s busted) but I looked through the whole album and was shocked that Shizz’s friend (we’ll call him G b/c I don’t see me ever mentioning him again) cleans up hella good and looked really hot.

So I asked Shizz if G had a gf…

Shizz: he is gay

11:19 AM me: really?

Shizz: no

me: ok

…

11:20 AM Shizz: lol

11:21 AM me: so what youre saying is

Shizz: he is straight

me: ok

and gf?

11:22 AM Shizz: nope

me: ok

So now I am genuinely confused. Why would Shizz not be like, “Omg you’re right! You two would make a perfect match bla bla bla I’ll hook you up!”?? This is why…

Shizz: he likes Asians

trust me

me: FUCK

Shizz: he is ruthless

me: UGHHWhat ever happened to guys wanting the white “girl next door” type?!?

when the fuck did white girls become not good enough

how does that happen?

I’m fucking moving to Asia

11:28 AM maybe ill be a hot commodity there

fuck this im sick of guys wanting an ethnic girl

sorry im super white and have a fantastic ass and perky boobs

11:29 AM sorry my blonde hair and blue eyes are too cute for you

sorry I get really pale in the winter

SHIZZ!

ARE YOU LISTENING

He wasn’t. So I did a little research on behalf of the Lauren Conrads of the world. I think I’m on to something. Yes Brody Jenner is kinnnd of a manwhore but he’s also pretty hot (at least I thought so till I read during researching that he’s only 5′9 1/2… too bad, sucha waste of a face).

Anyways, Lauren and Brody were a really cute couple.

Aren't we perfect?

Am I wrong? It’s just looks natural. It’s freagin Barbie and Ken! Come ON people this is the American dream for Christ sake.

But Brody didn’t want the American dream. Brody was thinking above the American dream. He wanted to expand his reach. (Maybe this is an alpha male thing?) He wanted Canada Jayde Nicole.

I've come to take your men

Ok so Canada isn’t really known for its ethnicity. But boys are stupid. And she looks kinda ethnic. Therefor she is. Period.

Next.

I'm a hot douchebag daddy

Next we have Tom Brady whom is a very interesting case study. 1) b/c he’s so hot. 2) b/c he seems to have no morals. and 3) he’s reached super fame and still thinks banging a supermodel makes him cooler. Ugh. Boys boys boys.

He was dating adorable Bridget Moynahan who hails from NY.

You're mom's gonna love me

Yes we ARE perfect. Thank you!

And they were perf together. Until he…

Gets her preggers. Dumps her. Decides he wants a girl with a Brazilian a Brazilian girl. Not just any Brazilian… no…a Brazilian supermodel who really only needs the one name.

Gisele.

Could I look any better than I do right now? No... no I don't think so

So what’s interesting about this is he did the opposite of Brody really. He had brunette (and Bridget can look super bangin when she wants to) and he switched to blond. I’ve always thought Gisele looked all American to be honest with you. In that “way hotter than American b/c I’m from Brazil” kinda way. It’s almost inhuman. I’m serious.

Like you cannot tell me that Adriana Lima was just born one day like the rest of us. There’s no way.

This doesn't just happen

I think that the Victoria’s Secret Angels are probably robots or aliens of some sort. Maybe even vampires. And I think there are other robots and aliens (or vampires) who refused to conform to their Angel ways but are still so hot that they’re famous anyways.

Like, for instance, Megan Fox maybe?

I'm too cool to be an Angel

Or maybe (lets go a little younger)… Vanessa Hudgens?

I think I'll give Disney a shot and try to find my male equivalent

That’s not the best picture of her. But we all know that kid is hot.

As an All American girl next door type, I’m scared. What if they make more of them? What if they eat All American girls for breakfast? (Megan Fox looks like she would devour me in a second without even thinking about it)

If they do I hope they start with Heidi Montag, b/c she sucks so much ass it’s not even funny.

Who me?!?

Yes you, you nasty whore. In fact. I think she may have single-handedly killed the All American girl next door fixation men used to have. Just sucking like she does would have done it but no, she had to go and be all “go McCain I love America!” on us. Well shit.

I love America but I can’t spell it!

If you didn’t know before that she was American. You do now. And she ruined it for all of us. No wonder Lauren hates her.

I could kill that Heidi bitch

Anyways. I guess I’m done ranting. Conclusion? Hell if I know. I guess I’ll go get some hair extensions and maybe one green contact to make my eyes stand out and be different. Just one contact though. I’ll be like Kate Bosworth but not emaciated. Like in Blue Crush minus 5 pounds of muscle.

Blogging really is the best therapy though b/c now that I’m done… I don’t really care that guys seem to want girls who are exotic and inhuman. I like being human. So those guys can just fuck off. They’re obviously compensating for something.

Most of them will come crawling back sooner or later. Boys always want what they don’t have.

And come on. Lauren is completely adorable.

Class & Intelligence Oozes Through G-Chat

Juicy: my belly button ring smells

me: ewwwwwwwwwww

mine used to do that

ew

my earrings do that, its gross

only when i leave them in too long

Sent at 3:47 PM on Wednesday

Juicy: yeah so sick

i just put it back in

im sad bc i gave all of my bb rings away

Sent at 3:48 PM on Wednesday

me: yeah we should buy more

mine are all old or broken

i just wear a loopty loop thing all the time

its boring

Juicy: yeah

the one i have in is trashy and blue

me: hahah

Juicy: yeahh

That’s Just Not Gonna Work

Yes, another Russian post.

He texted me 3 times last night. The last text was just my name with an exclamation point after it. Uh, hellllo I’m pretending I’ve already gone to bed it’s not like I can hear you screaming through text message. Geez. I didn’t even know boys still used exclamation points. I thought that was just a girl thing. Hmmm. Interesting.

So I texted him this afternoon and told him I didn’t think I had plans after work (no mention of coffee). He texted back and said great what time do you get off work. I said 6 or 6:30. He has a test at 7 so he wants to meet around 8 in Arlington (not too far from where I live). So… he’s still in school. That’s minus 15 points buddy.

Then he aim’ed me b/c I hadn’t responded yet (I like to wait). But luckily no chatting was involved b/c he just said hi and then, I gtg text me. So I did, 45 minutes later and asked him where in Arlington he wanted to meet. Ready for this?

“doesn’t matter just call me when you get there. If I get out early I’ll let you know.”

Hold up. I’m supposed to just drive to Arlington and like, wait? No I don’t think so. Where the fuck am I gonna wait? In my car?!? No, that is not ok.

I’ll meet you at a bar, I’ll meet you at a… um… different kind of place that serves alcohol… but I will not agree to pathetic plans like that. What are we even gonna do? He didn’t even say anything about that. I have no idea. (Obviously I’m hoping it involves alcohol)

Having no idea is one of the things I hate the most. I’m aware that I do this to my friends all the time by making half-ass plans and 1/2 the time not even following through but I do not let guys do that to me.

I’m gonna need an itinerary Russian.

I don’t know anything about this dude except that he’s not a U.S. citizen… minus 5 more points. Oh yeah but +3 points for the possibility of having really cute mixed babies with olive skin and blue eyes. sigh. Maybe that should be +5 and totally negate the citizen thing. They might be worth it.

Hmmmm I haven’t texted him back yet. I haven’t decided what to do. He’s not very tall… minus 8 points. He speaks another language= +5 points… I guess. Russian’s pretty cool, right?

Whatever it’s not like I’m gonna add up all these points when I’m done. I guess it’ll come down to how I’m feeling around 8 o’clock. Maybe I’ll text him and tell him that… but probably not. That doesn’t sound very nice does it?

How Do You Like Them Apples?

10:48 PM. The Russian just texted me back… twice. He wants to get together for coffee after work tomorrow or whenever I’m available. Putting aside the cliche-ness of getting together for coffee, I’d call this complete success. No guy facebook stalks a girl, sends her a message and then texts her back wanting to hang out to talk about one of her friends. (If this happens though I will definitely be blogging about it.) So I guess I’m excited.

I dunno, guys don’t really excite me anymore it’s just not as fun as it used to be. I haven’t even texted him back yet. It’s like no guy is good enough. Isn’t that sad? Like I’m Arphrodite or something (aspiring maybe?). I have got to get famous boy out of my head asap. I’ve done really good and haven’t texted him in over a month but I guess I’ve gotta come to terms with the fact that he’s just not that into me. I haven’t had to deal with that since I was like 15. And all those boys I used to “love” are now mediocre 27 year-olds who would love to date me and are pretty chubby to be honest with you.

But famous boy… he was like, it. Ya know? Fuckin Fuck man. This sucks. It’s so me… (high whiny voice) “But I want the one I cant haaaaaave!!!”

DAGGER!

No word from the Russian.

(I feel like I should work for the Government saying stuff like that.)

I will continue to wait (while not really waiting b/c that’s pathetic) and alert you the moment he contacts me… how professional. lol.

Unrelated Note of Stupidity

Holy flying groundhog balls I am Retarded. This whole day I’ve been putting Wednesday and Hump day on everything and it’s fucking Tuesday!!!

WHY DID NO ON TELL ME IT’S TUESDAY!? HOW AM I THIS RETARDED?

Uggghhh this is gonna be a long week.

Breaking News Report

Yup. Right when you think things are bla bla bla,  ho hum… BAM! POW! ZAP!… things are now interesting. I say Yay I really needed that.

Just a teensy bit of background needed.

Saturday night I went out with my girls to a rodeo. Yes, a real rodeo. It was a serious blasty blast. This was not my first rodeo, but my first one in the Northern area. Not as redneck as the southern ones but still def a good time. That’s not important though. I went with Kendra, another girlfriend Anna (more on Anna later) and another girlfriend Jamie (more on Jamie later too).

I was late b/c I had nothing to wear (this was before I had a panic attack and cleaned my room) so I missed pregame. Anna was tipsy when we got there so drunk by beer 2. I was feelin good by beer 3.

Kendra, Anna and I stepped outside during rodeo intermission to smoke a cig and there is a serious hottie standing there with his must-not-have-been-hot-b/c-I-cant-remember-what-he-looked-like friend. We giggle. We’re so mature. Hottie sees us (we’re all pretty girls not gonna lie) and tells Kendra that she looks familiar. This is not a pick-up line, turns out they had class together at community college a few years back. We’re impressed with his memory.

His phone rings. He answers. He speaks another language. We’re fascinated. We all debate what this language is. Kendra guesses right: He’s Russian. We will now refer to hottie as Russian. He looks more Italianish than Russian but whatever, he’s sexy.

So we’re chatting and after a few minutes I’m freezing half to death and wanna go back inside. So we all walk back towards our seats, Russian in tow, and he stops at the entrance before ours b/c that’s where he says his seat is. So we say goodbye and start walking to our seats until Anna stops. “He was fuckin hot guys.”

Kendra & I: “Ya he was.”

Anna: “I’m going back. I’m gonna get his number.”

She really wants to be one of those hard-to-get girls and thinks she is sometimes but Anna will always be a smother-er, if you know what I mean. So she goes into Russians section and stands there looking around b/c she has no idea where he’s sitting. She looks retarded. Kendra waits for her and I go back to my seat, I’m not that pathetic and Jamie is probably wondering where we are.

Anna finds Russian and runs up to exchange numbers. I love having friends like this that do all the dirty work for you

After the rodeo we line up to meet all the cowboys b/c some of those guys are really hot and they ride bulls for a living. How cool is that?! They wanna go out and we tell them all what bar we’re going to and they all decide to come too. Incredible.

We get to the bar (decked out in our rodeo gear; cowboy boots, flannel shirts, cowboy hats… my shirt says “Dirt Magnet” and it’s by John Deere. It doesn’t get any better than that in DC. You don’t find this kinda crowd anywhere in DC) and Anna texts Russian to tell him to come. He says he might. This is not good enough. Kendra gets his number from Anna (b/c I told her to) and calls him to personally invite him. Pause for effect. He decides to come after all.

So we’re waiting to get the bartenders attention and this guy with a cowboy hat on (not a bull rider, just a fan) buys Kendra and me a beer. This guy literally does not leave me alone for the duration of the night. He is a pathetic puppy, sweet as can be, but cannot differentiate between interested and uninterested women. I am totally uninterested. Being the nice person that I am, this is a nightmare. I endure.

Russian arrives. Smile. Anna will not talk to us b/c she’s pissed that he came when Kendra invited him and not when she did. So pissed that we don’t see her till we’re leaving the bar. Jamie sticks with Anna so we didn’t see her either. Oh well. Pish Posh.

Russian guy is awesome. He’s funny, charming, smart, has eyes that could make a bitch melt and chills with us the whole night. He had ditched his friends to come hang out with us (his friends went to Hooters).

Around 1:30 Kendra decides she wants to go to a house party to see friends (what she really means is ’see Daniel’). Russian debates going or not, decides to go with us. We go get our coats and come back to Russian saying he changed his mind and was going home. I smile and say nice to meet you that was fun bla bla bla and we turn and leave.

I’m a lil heartbroken and distraught that he didn’t ask for my number. I’m also confused when Kendra starts talking about Russian like he’s a new boyfriend prospect for her. I nod but think she must be mistaken, he was obviously interested in me right? I’m the friend that gets all the guys. It doesn’t matter who met him first I always win (friends kind of hate me for this, esp Anna). And Kendra still cant get past Daniel obviously, you cant have two men at once! Esp when I want one of them!

House party sucks, I twittered about it. I forget about Russian. Ok that’s the background.

I just got a facebook message from Russian. =) =) =) =) Fuck yeah I’m awesome. Thank you facebook. He says he found me through Kendra (I dunno how they found each other but whatever) and he wants to talk to me about something. And gives me his number.

Ok I was really excited about this and I just realized I have no idea what he wants to talk about. Damn. If it’s about Kendra I’m gonna be pissed. And disappointed. Ok I’m gonna find out what he wants to talk about. Trust me I will keep you posted.

Hump Day News

I watched the movie Burn After Reading and it was completely awful (worst movie ever) except for the fact that it’s set in DC (I always love that) and Brad Pitt was in it (still hot). So I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone. I did learn something from it though. Saying “shit” in reference to “stuff” (or instead of stuff) makes you sound like the biggest idiot ever. Even Brad Pitt is not an exception to this rule. Since I usually try to go against the flow of the retarded masses… I’m trying to stop saying “shit” so much. This is gonna be hard b/c I say it all the time. Seriously. Ok bear with with me. Hump Day News.

I’ve been trying to buckle down and really get stuff done. Phew ok this isn’t so hard.

That said, getting stuff done translates into not a lot of interesting stuff to blog about. I know… it’s awful. But this is what I’ve been up to.

• I cleaned my room. This is huge. I haven’t cleaned my room since I moved back home in April… yeah. I promised my mom for her birthday that I would clean it (details on this later). I had at least 20 baskets full of clothes and random stuff (mail, magazines, stuff from car, Christmas gifts, etc.) and I sorted through all of them and put everything away. I still have 2 huge hampers full of clothes to wash and take to cleaners but you cant build Rome in a day… or something. I also have no where to put these clothes once I wash them because all my closet and drawer space is full. Totally full. I even have a free standing clothing rod that’s full… I have so much stuff. It’s unreal.
• I’ve been getting work done at work. I know. Amazing. Except today… I missed blogging too much.
• I’ve turned over a new leaf to go to bed earlier and get up on time, shower every morning, put on makeup and get to work on time and adorably presentable. This morning was a failure (I went to bed at 2… don’t really know why) and overslept a little so I had to skip the shower and was 30 min. late to work. But I feel like that’s ok b/c it was snowing and people suck at driving in snow. I did manage to pull together a smashing outfit and put on fresh makeup. So not a complete failure. I’ll try again tomorrow.
• I’ve started keeping a to-do list again. Oh how I’ve missed my to-do lists. They kind of suck though b/c every time I look at it I’m reminded that I still have to write Christmas thank you notes. Boo Hiss. I hate thank you notes. Obviously I’m thankful for presents. Who isn’t? Presents are awesome. Thank you notes are bland and boring and end up in the trash. A total waste of cute notes and envelopes in my opinion.
• I shaved my legs (among other things) and thank Jesus, Mary and Joseph I did. It had been at least a month. TMI? I feel like this could be the beginning of a regular shaving regime. Exciting isn’t it? (Twenty-something men around the world rejoice)
• I joined Twitter. I kind of love it. “This is what I’m doing world! If you don’t care you can suck it!”
• I finally figured out how to upload photos from my new camera to my new computer. Sigh of relief. This was a huge stress for me.
• I’m in the process of downloading Photoshop CS4 Extended Edition (like right now) and I’m amped about it. Maybe I can charge it to the company?? Is that ethical?
• I’m relearning French. 7 years of French classes should be a good base wouldn’t you say?

That’s it really. The other stuff is really boring so I’ll spare you. Don’t be disappointed I’ll pep it up soon =P

Au revoir pour maintenant!

Why Bella Has No Social Life?

When I was 18 I was celebrating my high school  graduation (I graduated on my birthday, literally), enjoying my last summer at home (as a high school student) with my friends going to parties, concerts, etc. and packing up my massive amount of stuff to head off to college. Seems normal enough.

As we all know, Hollywood isn’t really the definition of normal. So I guess it makes sense that Kristen Stewart (Bella in the Twilight movies) hasn’t finished  high school. That’s Ok though… she has more money and exposure than I’ll probably ever have (hopefully not but… I’m just being realistic… or pessimistic or whatever). More power to her.

My dad always says “life’s not fair” and so far he’s always been right. Including now. I came across these photos on the Internet the other day and I now envy Kristen Stewart even more. A 24 year old jealous of an 18 year old… ugh.

Behold… Bella smokes pot.

I’m sorry but when I see a Hollywood actress who’s made out to be lil miss wholesome say “paparazzi be damned” and smoke a bowl on her front (or back) porch I get a little giddy. So this kind of made my day. Not only that… look how freagin normal she looks. Her whole outfit could be from Wal-Mart. Gray men’s sweats and what looks like a Hanes x-large little boys wife beater. I’m in heaven. She even checks herself out maybe to make sure the munchies aren’t affecting her waistline…

Yes Kristen, you’re still skinny as shit. It gets better. I’ve never ever done this to my dog, but her dog looks like he/she’s used to it. And I’ve definitely had many friends from college do this. I’m pretty sure she gets her dog high too…

I know I sound like a pothead or a green party supporter with all these posts about weed, but I’m not. I just know that a lot of people smoke pot (esp teenagers and young 20 somethings) and obviously it doesn’t mean you’re gonna live in your moms basement till your 40. She looks like she’s got a nice little setup wherever she lives. And here I am still living with my parents. Life’s not fair.

But question… Who’s the guy with her? I’m guessing it’s her boyfriend but I can’t remember his name. His hair looks very Edwardish. So if Kristen has the same tastes as Bella… Maybe this explains why she had no social life in Forks, as well as the blank pages of months in New Moon. Smoke that pain away Bella. Whatever makes you feel better.

Ok enough with the drug talk. More socially acceptable topics coming soon =)