Happy Give Something You Love Up Day

Ash Wednesday. No I’m not Catholic, but I usually give something up for lent just because I think it’s a good practice. A self-control exercise. It’s good to give something up for a while to prove that your vices don’t own you.

Problem. I dunno what to give up. In the past I’ve given up all potato products (fries, chips, mashed pots, double baked pots, etc) that was a hard one, I could live on french fries, but I did it. What else… umm I did all desserts one year, that wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be. I gave up sexual practices one year (in high school so it really wasn’t too much to give up). Snacks another year. I forget what else I’ve given up but you get the point.

I’m having a very selfish year. I can think of tons of things to give up but I don’t wanna go 40 days without those things. I think I’m missing the point of lent completely but whatever. Anyone got any ideas?

Hey Twilighters… Check Out Your Next Birthday Cake

How Incredible is this!!?!?

I know all you Twilight Fans are freaking out right now. Whoever thought this up is an amazing super genius. I can’t wait for my birthday. It’ll be a Twilight themed party: Meaning only really really ridiculously good looking people allowed.

Quarter-life Crisis

These past few days I’ve been having a major quarter-life crisis. WTF am I doing with my life??? This is NOT what I had in mind when I used to think of myself at (almost) age 25.  My job is boring with a capital B. I hate hate hate it. I hate being in a cube, being in an office, being at a desk, sitting on my ass all day. I’m literally wasting away under these horrid fluorescent lights. It’s gotten me thinking. Some seriously serious thinking. I’m thinking of joining the Navy.

This could be me soon

Only cuter… obviously. Why not? Ya know? I’ll get some extremely serious exercise. Something I’ve been craving for a while but can’t find the time or discipline for. I’ll get to travel, a lot. I think I might want to go to aviation school and become a Navy pilot.

How cool is that?!??!? Seriously not your average day job. How exciting would that be!? I’d never thought about it before. And now, I’m totally contemplating it.

I’d go in as an officer since I’ve graduated college. It just sounds really exciting. And I have been craving excitement for a long time. My mom’s not too happy, she thinks I’ll be called to war or something. Which is the only really sucky thing I can think of about joining the Navy.

My dad said he’d be really proud. Of course he would; he’s been saying his little baby’s gonna “fly jets off aircraft carriers” since I was ten years old. But maybe he was right? Maybe I will.

Lily Allen is Fucking Incredible

My boss wanted 8 solid hours of work today. So, of course, I haven’t done anything at all work related yet. It’s 2:15 PM. Fucking Fabulous. What did he really expect on a Saturday? Seriously. However, I haven’t been completely useless. I have found my new favorite song. I could listen to it all day. The Fear is the shit. For realz.

Here are the amazing lyrics. Lily Allen is a fucking genius. Anyone who uses the word “fuckloads” in a song (especially in relation to diamonds) is a gem in my book. I don’t have a book but if I did, they’d be in it. And they’d be a gem. [Gem= a fantastical person I'm obsessed with]

I want to be rich and I want lots of money
I don’t care about clever I don’t care about funny
I want loads of clothes and fuckloads of diamonds
I heard people die while they’re trying to find them

And I’ll take my clothes off and it will be shameless
‘Cuz everyone knows that’s how you get famous
I’ll look at the sun and I’ll look in the mirror
I’m on the right track yeah I’m on to a winner

[Chorus]
I don’t know what’s right and what’s real anymore
And I don’t know how I’m meant to feel anymore
When do you think it will all become clear?
‘Cuz I’m being taken over by The Fear

Life’s about film stars and less about mothers
It’s all about fast cars cussing each other
But it doesn’t matter cause I’m packing plastic
and that’s what makes my life so fucking fantastic

And I am a weapon of massive consumption
and it’s not my fault it’s how I’m programmed to function
I’ll look at the sun and I’ll look in the mirror
I’m on the right track yeah we’re on to a winner

I don’t know what’s right and what’s real anymore
I don’t know how I’m meant to feel anymore
When do you think it will all become clear?
‘Cuz I’m being taken over by The Fear

Forget about guns and forget ammunition
Cause I’m killing them all on my own little mission
Now I’m not a saint but I’m not a sinner
Now everything’s cool as long as I’m getting thinner

I don’t know what’s right and what’s real anymore
I don’t know how I’m meant to feel anymore
When do you think it will all become clear?
‘Cause I’m being taken over by fear

Alright well I have fuckloads of work to do. So I guuueeessss I should try to get to it. Ugh.

Annnnd I’m back

I got back Tuesday night. While driving from Key West to Miami to go home (in our Chrysler convertible we named “My Little Pony”) Juicy and I decided we weren’t ready to go home yet. So we stayed in Miami for another night =)

Not the best financial decision we’ve ever made (hotel room $450, switching flights $300, cabs to and from Miami airport to SoBe ~$100 + misc. expenses)

Totally worth it though. We stayed in our favorite hotel: Loews South Beach. Unfortunately we were so burned, drained, hungover, dehydrated,  sleep deprived and food deprived that we didn’t even go out at night. Pathetic.

We showered, put on the amazing robes and watched Discovery Kids all night while chugging water. DK is my new favorite channel. They have shows like The Challenge and Lost but it’s the kid version. Its amazing. “The Challenge” is called Endurance and “Lost” is called Flight 29 Down. Y’all should really really check it out. The kiddie drama is incredible.

We got to lay out on South Beach and the pool at Loews before our flight the next day. That’s why it was worth it. I’m tan. Yay!

On my Favorite Bench at Loews

Needless to say… now that I’m back at work I’m pretty much miserable. I’m still exhausted and feel like crying at random moments b/c I just wanna be back in the Keys instead of here in DC where it’s 30 degrees.

Thinking about the trip makes me wanna burst into tears but I’ll try my best to give you some highlights.

~We rented a white mini van for the drive from Miami to Key West. We named her Flower Child.

~We did end up having a theme night. Our first night there, in honor of Flower Child, was Hippie Night. We nailed it. Boys flocked.

Peace & Love

~We met a boy who is a captain on a yacht. He loved us. We got to hang out on the yacht late night and went back the next day to drink and “go for a ride”.

Posing on the yacht

~Turns out he’s not the captain. He’s just part of the crew. Seriously. Hilarious. We found this out when we asked to take it for a spin and he said he couldn’t actually do that. Idiot.

~I met a cute Key West boy. He actually IS a captain, but on a fishing boat. He takes people out on his boat to go deep sea fishing. Yes obviously we got to go deep sea fishing… for free =)

So gorgeous

~Since it was just the three of us… we decided to make it topless deep sea fishing. Sorry can’t show you pictures from that.

~Key West boy broke up with his girlfriend of almost 3 years… less than 3 weeks ago. We saw her out at some bars. The looks she gave me could have cut through a pineapple. I found it hilarious.

~His ex had left some of her jewelry at his house. Yes, I am now the owner of some really cute jewelry. Thanks ex girlfriend! Oh and a huge red hoodie, but I stole that from Key West boy, not his ex gf.

~I got into 4 fights. Confrontations really. I guess when local boys call dibs on  pretty girls there on vacation… other local boys don’t like it too much. When I’m drunk you don’t fuck with me, I can get very confrontational. I’m the girl that jumps in between boys who are fighting. Not really smart. I didn’t get hit or anything, just name called. “Ohh no! Fuck me?? I’m a bitch? Oh GOD NO what am I gonna DO!?!? No ones ever called me that before! I’m SO hurt!” Guys… please come up with some original material. I won every confrontation. They all ended with, “You’re like, an awesome chick, we should def meet up later.” No thank you. I’m good.

~We went to a strip club. Twice. No I did not strip. But I kinda wanted to.

~We caught a 55 pound Cobia.

It's taller than me

Well, it’s almost as tall as me.

~We rode mechanical bulls. I did awesome. The guy told us to “ride it like you’re making love…” uhhh ok creepy. It works though.

RIde IT YEE HAW!

That’s a really short synopsis. I gotta go home and get ready to go out tonight. Because of our little stop in Miami I have to work tomorrow (ON A SATURDAY) to make up for some time I took off that I didn’t have. FML. But that means I will probably blog.

Don’t Miss Me Too Much

Work… DONE

Payed Bills… YUP

Starting to freak out because I haven’t started packing for Florida… Definitely

I’m not taking my computer so I’ll be MIA till Tuesday. It’s gonna be really weird. But nice at the same time. Getting disconnected is healthy every once in a while.

I will have my phone though… Meaning I’ll be updating Twitter… Probably often. I can’t be totally disconnected, I’d go insane. So you guys can check out what I’m doing on vacation while your stuck at work

When I get back I know I’ll have awesome stories to tell so get excited. Here are some pictures to make you jealous. Seriously that’s the only purpose of these pictures.

Now that you hate me… I really will miss y’all!

Don’t worry I’ll have a daiquiri for you… or ten.

Is This Normal?

The past two nights I’ve had wicked awful insomnia. Laying in bed till 6am trying to relax my forehead and shoulders, trying to clear my head from the ridiculous amount of thoughts streaming through my brain a million miles a second and trying to remember how I used to go to sleep so easily.

I was one of those “head hits the pillow and she’s out” kinda girls. Not recently. Last night I resorted to counting and focusing on breathing. I got to 244 before boredom took over my brain and the thoughts began again.

I think about the weirdest stuff. 3am in the morning and I’m thinking about blogging of all things. Not only am I thinking about blogging, I’m thinking about thinking about blogging. Does that make sense? I get anxiety about getting all my thoughts in writing (an impossible task). I’m a complete nutcase.

It doesn’t help that I ran out of xanax three days ago. In fact, it’s the opposite of help. Thankfully I can pick more up today so hopefully I’ll get some sleep tonight. Probably not though since I leave for Florida at 5:30 in the morning and I haven’t packed yet. So I’ll probably be up till 2. FML.

My face is rebelling against my new sleep patterns. Rebelling in the form of a massive zit an inch above my lip. Like a boil. Ugh. It was one of those “under the skin” for 3 days and might not have even surfaced but I’m OCD (self-proclaimed). So what did I do? 2 nights ago I decide to pick at it even though I couldn’t even really see it yet. I was determined to get it off my face. It didn’t work. At all. Never try to dig a zit out of your skin, it will only make it 100 times worse.

So needless to say I’ve had a couple of really ugly days. Days where makeup is shunned b/c it wont even make a difference. On the bright side I’ve been tanning a few times and no longer have a sick pale tint to my skin. I semi-glow. I’m praying that this monster on my face is healed by tomorrow so I can enjoy my vacation. Please pray for me.

Could Be A Cullen 2

It’s been a while since I posted the first “Could Be A Cullen”. Mostly because it’s hard for me to find guys hot enough to make the list. Celeb guys aren’t that hot to me. It takes something special to impress me. Obviously this is a personal preference thing. I’ll let you judge for yourselves.

To be a Cullen though… that’s not easy. I stumbled across this gorgeous bloke on some random girls photobucket while looking for something else. Where the hell has he been hiding?!?

Behold. Jensen Ackles.

Really Really Ridiculously Good Looking

I did a little bit of digging on behalf of this hottie. He’s been hiding on the CW’s Supernatural of all places. Not only is he definitely hot enough to be a Cullen; he’s already familiar with freakishly weird occurrences.

He’s perfect.

Just look at him.

Smoldering Look... Check

Just so we're clear. Smoldering look... Check

Smokin Hot Body... Check Check Check

Chisled Features... Huge check

Looks Sexy as Hell Lounging on Car... Check

Extra Checks for just being Extra Hot

I dunno if this guy can act but I’d pay to see him in a movie. Preferably New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn.

Someone get this face on the big screen!

More Checks…

Fits in Perfectly with Vampire-like Surroundings... Check

Personal Fetish Checks... This One Completely Sealed the Deal for me. I'm In Love.

Once I fell in love I had to make sure there weren’t any deal-breakers (height is a biggie for me). Just as I hoped, there were none. He’s 6′1. He’s from Dallas, TX. He has a little sister (my age) named Mackenzie (one of my favorite names). We could be BFF.

He was born March 1, 1978 making him… ummm 30? Almost 31 years old? My math is so embarrassing.

He’s a jock. He plays golf. His favorite song is Freebird (we’re seriously soul mates). He also likes country music. I love you.

Jensen: (on what he likes in a woman) Me and my buddies say, ‘Someone who gets it.’ Gets sarcasm, gets high-brow humor. Ultimately, someone who you can pal around with and also be intimate with. Someone who can laugh at your jokes–it may sound cheesy, but someone who can be your best friend as well as your lover.

I get it. Omg that’s totally me. Sign me up. Where do I sign my name? Someone get me a pen asap!

I realize this post has gone from “Could Be A Cullen” to “Could Be My Soul Mate” and I’m sorry. I didn’t see this developing. But I can’t stop now! He could be both!

More research. Just read that he’s in My Bloody Valentine 3D. Dammit. I knew I wanted to see that movie. Jensen in 3D. What could be better?

Someone find out if this guy has a girlfriend or wife or anything. I’ve gotta stop googling him and get some work done. God he’s hot.

Edward?

Thoughts on Obama’s Speech. Live.

• Why do I care about the people who bought houses they can’t afford and spent money they don’t have? I wouldn’t give them a dollar if they asked for it in person… why are you trying to take my money and give it to other people to spend???!? I’m trying to SAVE thank you  very much.
• Our President must be on massive amounts of anti-anxiety meds.
• It’s not his fault. He inherited this shit debt. Obvious answer to ridiculous debt: Spend a shit ton of money (that we don’t have)… WTF is he gonna say in 4 years? “It’s not my fault… this was all your idea?”
• “Hippie” leadership makes me wanna throw a Wii controller at  Obama’s head the TV.
• Please God stop saying, “Create millions of jobs”.
• Why does Obama think that the world is a bowl full of cherries? We CANT all get along. It will never ever happen. You sound stupid.
• Notice how he doesn’t answer the question… he just goes on a tangent of things that seeeem to be related to the question but aren’t at all.
• I didn’t realize the brainwashing effect that GW Bush had over Washington. Now that Obama is in office, “the last 8 years” has become more like a Cult… Who writes this shit? Does Obama realize that doing the complete opposite of whatever Bush would do does NOT mean you’re doing the right/smart thing??? “Bush would hate it” is NOT a good reason to push a bill through Congress asap.
• Obama sounds like a Cult leader. A stuttering Cult leader.
• People with bad credit are not victims of bad Government… they’re victims of their own irresponsible spending. Since when is it the Government’s job to kiss it and make it better? How does taking from the rich and giving to the stupid fix anything?
• This is going to be the next civil war. Seriously people. No joke.
• “What we need… is more credit” WHAT!? What we need is a Schoolhouse Rock video about responsible spending and saving. Credit is NOT the answer. Helllllllllo even greater depression.
• Go fix Chicago and then get back to me.
• A South Carolina High School  built in the 1800’s? “Kids still learn here. It’s next to the train tracks and they have to wait for trains to pass to continue teaching.” Um ok… sooooo what’s your point? Historical buildings should be torn down? Kids cant learn in buildings more than 20 years old? We shouldn’t use trains anymore? Why isn’t the county down there putting money into their school systems like ours is? Why can’t Democrats take responsibility for anything?
• The Government is there to GOVERN the Nation. Not CHANGE THE NATION.
• “Old habits are hard to break”. If Obama didn’t suggest it, it’s an “old habit”. It’s not cool. This Government only does what’s cool.
• It’s starting to sound like Obama (not Congress, the House) runs the United States of America. Jesus Christ we’re doomed. Maybe Germany will bail us out in a few years. Now that would be irony.
• “Eternal optimist”…  Me too… Does that make me a good National leader????
• More questions now than I had before. I wish I could call Obama directly and say,”I know what you’re trying to do. And it’s stupid. It’s not going to work so STOP it. I think you’re more suited for legalizing marijuana; NOT saving the world. Two years ago I didn’t believe the world was going to end in 2012… now, thanks to you, I can totally see that happening. You’re ruining half of America’s life. Screw the other half, they ruined there own lives. You cant make everyone happy. A good re-election strategy is to keep the wealthy happy. Just so you know. God help us (and NO by God I do NOT mean you).”

Random Monday Thoughts

I figured out all the words to All-American Rejects “Hope it gives you hell” song this weekend. I love it now. I dunno how I didn’t get it before.

As I was writing the letter to Beyonce (through research) I realized she sang the “Diva” song. I hadn’t known this before. I’m an idiot.

I’m really really glad that Lady GaGa wasn’t a one hit wonder. Check out “Poker Face“.

Black Tie Gala’s with open bar and silent auctions are the BEST. Especially when your date is your dad. Especially when your dad drinks enough to not be able to remember what he bid on and what I bid on. (My mom hates these things so he always takes me.) My salon was sponsoring the dinner (it was a community event) and had items in the silent auction. YAAAYY!! I bid on three of the four items. Two gift certificates both worth $200 each for any service at the salon, and at the last minute a gift basket with a Chi straightener in it and a buncha brushes and shampoo and stuff valued at $400. I won it alllllll. $400 to the salon I already go to… and I need an appointment bad anyways… and the $400 gift basket… for $320 Free! THANKS DAD! Seriously, this takes a huge financial stress off of me for at least 8 months. Getting your hair done is expensive. And my straightener was gonna break any day now. I’ve never been so happy.

My hair girl was there and she was being cute and said, “Omg who does you hair it looks sooo good!”

So I said, “Oh I have an amazing hair stylist I’m so lucky to have her. He he. I really need to get my ass back to the salon though, it’s about time.”

Then she got serious, inspected my hair and said, “Yea you really do, your roots are looking terrible.” Thanks girl. You’re so sweet.

But anyways, it was funny. AND there’s more… The Drifters were there. Like from the 50’s (I think) it was SO cool. I felt like I was in Hairspray or something dancing with my dad to “My Girl”. It was adorable.

I’m trying to get a good base tan before I jet to the Florida Keys on Thursday. Wish me luck. I’m still pale as white paint after 2 tanning sessions. Ugh.

My mom left a lower cabinet open and I ran right into it. I have a nasty lookin bruise on my thigh now that matches the one on my other thigh I got from snowboarding… They’re gonna look fabulous in a bikini.

Juicy and I are planning on having “theme nights” for our vacation. It’s gonna be awesome. I love dressing up. So far we have Indian Princess night, Punk Rock Princess night, Disney Princess Night, Pop Princess Night, and Hawaiian Princess Night. I’m sure you’ve figured out the overall theme. Any ideas?